How To Deal With Temper Tantrums

How To Deal With Temper Tantrums Every parent knows exactly how tricky and embarrassing it is when they are cornered to deal with temper tantrums at one time or another. Call it a toddler meltdown or emotional blackmail, finding ways to deal with temper tantrums are never easy especially when kids [...]

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How To Identify Personality Type From Your Kids Behavior

How To Identify Personality Type From Your Kids Behavior With the increasing awareness of the possibility to predict children’s future via various types of assessment on kids behavior, many parents have placed much emphasis on early education and talent nurturing programs to help their kids develop more defined personality type faster. [...]

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How To Deal With Temper Tantrums

Posted by Sarah on February 20th, 2012

How To Deal With Temper Tantrums

Every parent knows exactly how tricky and embarrassing it is when they are cornered to deal with temper tantrums at one time or another. Call it a toddler meltdown or emotional blackmail, finding ways to deal with temper tantrums are never easy especially when kids don’t have any reservation in taking the public hostage by screaming their demands to your attention.

You Are Not Alone

According to Dr. Harvey Karp, board-certified pediatrician, associate professor of pediatrics at UCLA School of Medicine, the main reason why toddlers often resort to temper tantrums is largely due to their difficulties in using verbal expressions to describe their feelings or needs. This can pretty much explain why parents to about 80 percent of 1-2 year olds often have to deal with temper tantrums while the issue hits less on families with toddlers beyond 3 although toddler meltdowns are still common kids behavior way up to 4 and 5 years-old.

Know Your Child Before You Deal With Temper Tantrums

The reason why some parents get extremely upset and lost when forced to deal with temper tantrums are their lack of insight to the permittivity of young toddlers which Dr. Harvey Karp describes as having uncultivated right brain to control impulsive actions and emotions. Hence, it is us as parents’ job to find “compatible” approach to deal with temper tantrums effectively.

Initially, the much needed groundwork to deal with temper tantrums is identifying your child’s temperament based on developmental milestone. Another important piece of information to deal with temper tantrums is to know the personality type. By piecing up the behavioral puzzle, you will be able to judge methods that work best for your child to deal with temper tantrums.

Video – Know Your Child To Deal With Temper Tantrums Effectively

Consistency Is The Key

No matter how much you think your child doesn’t like being put on schedule, having timetable will eliminate your frustration to adjust to your child’s preference. Moreover, an effective step to deal with temper tantrums is to let them know (don’t worry if they are still too young to comprehend) both you and your child have rules to follow. Before releasing him/her to playtime, show them in front of the clock (preferably analog) that he/she shall stop the activity when the clock’s hand points at the time you set for other chores/activities. This way, they will have little room to argue and if they put up remonstrations still, consider some appropriate warnings or punishments to deal with temper tantrums.

Warnings & Punishments

Given that children of modern family are mostly spared from the rod, asserting appropriate disciplinary actions is necessary to deal with temper tantrums effectively. Stern warnings (while showing serious face BUT NOT shouting) can usually catch their attention long enough to put your message through but if all fails, you should have no qualms in sending them to time-out corner or chair.

At times, the way to deal with temper tantrums of stubborn child is by implementing a little physical punishment (slapping on the palm). Even though this method may not be acceptable to some, a little punishment is needed to show your serious discouragement towards the unwanted kids behavior. However, note that this should be applied sparingly only to children above 2 as action-consequences is a concept that may not be understood below that age.

Use Appropriate Level To Deal With Your Child

Every time your child lets it out, your first response to deal with temper tantrums should be to stand eye-to-eye with your child at arms length. To deal with temper tantrums, direct communication works the best as your child can read your lips and facial expressions to gauge the seriousness of a situation. While giving him/her your firm but not hurtful grip on the arm, ask what he/she wants or if that’s impossible, help him/her phrase the feelings by finding his/her cues.

If your child tends to be physically rash (uncontrollable) during meltdowns, retreat him to a safer place to vent his anger if he’s at home. If you are at the mall and get stuck to deal with temper tantrums, proceed to check-out counter or leave everything to head straight to exit. Keep a close watch and ask if your child is ready to stop and talk. Have it repeated every 5-10 minutes until he/she settles down. Then, guide with simple phrases to acknowledge his feeling by identifying what bothers or frustrates your child.

Withdraw BUT NOT Ignore

Where else is the best place to assert on your rules to deal with temper tantrums other than comfort of your home? Young toddlers are little attention-cravers and by removing your focus (make sure every family member is cooperative) during the screaming fits, you teach them the consequences of having exactly that privilege confiscated. However, often times parents who struggle to deal with a screaming child may turn helpless and eventually ignore the “annoying” kids behavior. While it is wise to disregard their pushy demands, prolonged ignorance may imply that screaming is normal and acceptable.

The next time your kids throw him/herself on the floor again, walk away from the scene. It can be unbearable to deal with temper tantrums accompanied by high-pitched shouts for half an hour but hang on and see what unwraps. If he/she runs back to you with reduced fits, firmly let them know you don’t like the loud screams and cries, teach them to apologize (yes, even a 2 year-old will understand this) and then lead them onto another activity.

Intervene anything beyond 20 minutes via distraction as it is quite futile to prolong the tantrum episode because toddlers are neither good at judging time nor controlling their emotions consciously. As they start settling down on another activity, try to show by example on how to make proper request in sentence or signing if they are yet to talk. This shall teach them alternative channels to put their thoughts or requests through other than squealing and reduce likeliness to deal with temper tantrums in future.

Life-Saving Tips In The Public

Let Them Know The Plans Ahead Of Time

Just like adults prefer working towards anticipated goals, your child likes to know what to expect when going to “foreign” places. By making a deal on what they will gain in return for behaving themselves, you greatly reduce your chances of having to deal with temper tantrums. Try telling your child that if they will spend an hour at the supermarket without screaming or crying, they get to choose whether to make extra trip to their favorite park or bookstore. By allowing some freedom to choose their rewards, your child will appreciate and keen on following your rules.

Be Ahead of The Tantrum

Have you ever land in one of those days where you still end up having to deal with temper tantrums no matter how brief your trips are? This situation is probably due to your child’s basic needs gone unnoticed. The next time your child needs to tag along, be sure to prep up on the following:

Bring Snack – Your child needs sugar boost for afternoon trips as their energy drain quickly after lunch.
Ample Nap – To avoid tantrums, lead them for a cat nap before going through the door, better still, schedule trips around their timetable.
Bring Their Favorite Item – Store it in your bag and present to them only when situation arise.

Video – How To Deal With Temper Tantrums In The Public

Work Around Your Child’s Limit

Sometimes, it is rather unrealistic to think that preparing your trip by lugging enough snacks, toys, milk and nappies can stretch the trip. However, toddlers are still toddlers – they need to return to their own territory to recharge. Hence, to avoid another occasion to deal with temper tantrums, either split your shopping trips into two sessions or concentrate your marketing to things on your list exclusively.

Other Perspectives To Deal With Temper Tantrums

Although most of the time temper tantrums is attributed to development phases, there is a small window of opportunity that patterns of kids behavior are influenced by food and environment. By charting down your child’s activities or food they consumed beforehand when the temper tantrum occurs, you will be able to narrow down possibilities and identify the stressors that led up to their meltdown.

Having to deal with temper tantrums is a challenging tasks and it is very normal to seek external supports by working closely with his/her pre-school teachers and consulting pediatrician to discuss the situation further. With the right intervention, you will eliminate pressure that may escalate to depression as well as bringing your child back to the right developmental track sooner.

Three Biggest Don’ts To Deal With Temper Tantrums

Whatever the cause or trigger that provoke your child’s frustration, always bear in mind that losing your rationale when forced to deal with temper tantrums can lead to undesirable consequences. If you think that you are not fit at the moment to deal with temper tantrums, withdraw yourself from the scene and repeat yourself in the mirror “My child has yet to gain good control over his/her emotion. I need to help, not worsen the situation.”

Most importantly:

Never Shout Back – You only teach your child the loudest wins and no reasoning is required.
Never Smack – You only teach your child that the strongest wins and aggression is acceptable.
Never Overuse “Keep Quiet!” or “Shut Up!” – You only teach your child to end dispute by shutting down communication and without solving the problem.

We have heard aplenty that problems should be treated from the root cause – same applies to deal with temper tantrums. If you are the parents to 3 or 4 year-olds and think you are off the “corrective golden stage”, don’t despair. Although it is recommended that kids behavior be tuned since early toddlerhood, you may probably only need to double or triple the legwork to deal with temper tantrums and still get to enjoy peaceful environment eventually.

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How To Deal With A Screaming Child

Posted by Sarah on February 20th, 2012

How To Deal With A Screaming Child

Perhaps you already know that giving in to deal with a screaming child is the worst strategy of all but every time the outburst erupts in public, it is still the first method you recall to put out the fire. However, quick fixes do not always save you from embarrassments but getting prepared to deal with a screaming child earlier on can save you much hassle in the long run.

Be Understanding While Maintaining Authority

To deal with a screaming child while maintaining sanity will require your understanding that young children especially those below 2 years-old have limited vocabulary, the level of difficulty in conveying their thoughts about their emotional needs and other daily requests often provoke their frustrations which lead to screaming, kicking, crying and flailing. While we as parents have an important job to improve their communication with patience, we should never overlook the importance to assert some rules to deal with a screaming child to avoid letting the transitional kids behavior developing into permanent kids behavior.

Good Foundation Starts From Home

On some days, they may scream out of excitement. On other days, they are pushing their limits to test parents’ patience and tolerance. Whatever the reason is, the way to deal with a screaming child is by preventing it in the first place. Hence, setting up a standard practice to deal with a screaming child will help you establish the much needed consistency.

Be Firm

By regulating your actions-consequences and rewards systems, your child will not leverage his/her privilege to threaten you when out in the public because he/she knows you want to quickly deal with a screaming child just to save the embarassment. If you don’t give him his favorite toy when he screams for it at home, you will not either when he throws his fits in the shopping mall. Perhaps you may need to withdraw from the scene to avoid public interruptions but your consistencies will pay off in the long run.

To deal with a screaming child effectively, exercise the consistencies beginning from home where you can withdraw yourself and let them vent their anger at the time-out chair or corner without worrying about unnecessary attention brought by your child shouting. When they begin to cool down, guide them to follow the proper way of making request.

Video – Using Withdrawal To Deal With A Screaming Child

Distractions

An alternative method to deal with a screaming child below 2 is probably this – whenever he/she screams, hold them tight and touch their eyes corner while firmly saying “Please stop crying and yelling. Mommy can’t understand what you want from your stream of tears”. Then point to their lips and say “Use your mouth to tell Mommy what you want.” Help him/her to figure out and express what’s in their mind. On one hand, your gestures serve as a physical distraction. On the other, you are guiding them to a proper communication.

Watch Your Tone and Gesture

As it is normal for our emotions to be stirred up by wild screams, the responsive feelings we choose to deal with a screaming child may reduce or aggravate the chaos. Although your louder shouts may seize their squealing for the moment, raising your voice to shrink theirs will stimulate them to shout even louder to win over next time. To end the vicious cycle, try adapting a softer approach to deal with a screaming child such as:

Physical Interaction

As always, young children deal better with direct communication rather than plain scolding while dragging them to a corner. Hence, when out in the public and you are donned in another situation to deal with a screaming child, hold them tight within your arm’s length, place your finger on the lips and tell them that screaming makes everyone feel uncomfortable and that they should show or tell you what they want. Remember to maintain eye contact and let them know you are trying to understand rather than just punishing.

Winding Them Down

After your initial effort to talk your child out, give him/her some time to settle down. When the pandemonium begins to diffuse, hold them closer, tell them you love them more when they are being calm and that their shouting hurt your ears. Teach them to show or tell what they want or divert their attention to other things if you feel it’s inappropriate to oblige to their request. Remember, never rush into settling them down by threats as this is a counter-effective way to deal with a screaming child.

Video – Using Correct Discipline To Deal With A Screaming Child

Validate Their Statement

While struggling to improve on their verbal skills, young toddlers may often be irritated by the challenge in expressing his/her needs where you will probably come to deal with a screaming child thereafter. To reduce this inclination, try deciphering what your child is trying to tell and help him/her phrase their statement. Saying “Are you telling that you want the blue shirt, not the yellow one?” while pointing at the blue shirt can be a good way in teaching him/her to organize demand.

What makes validation works to deal with a screaming child, according to pediatrician Dr. Harvey Karp of UCLA School of Medicine, is that reinforcing your child’s feelings will lift the stress from his/her immature verbal skills. Hence, Dr. Harvey recommends that parents guide toddlers by using Toddler-ese (toddler language) which should be short-phrased with soft tone, supported by body gestures and facial expressions.

Preventive Steps To Deal With A Screaming Child

Although we cannot estimate the coming of toddler meltdown, preparing ourselves to deal with a screaming child through active listening and physical environment can save us a great deal of stress and anxiety. With active listening, you need to read their cues attentively when the first sign of frustration arise.

If ever they demand for something you are not ready to oblige, present them with alternatives within your boundary. For instance, if your child wants to buy a toy you don’t intend to, suggest that they choose either to visit the bookstore or join the kids at the play land. Nonetheless, refraining from bringing your child to tempting or quiet places is the best preventive measure in being pressured to give in or risk having to deal with a screaming child.

Fortify Your Emotion

The freakiest thing about a screaming child is the unwanted attention brought on by their drama. But knowing that your main concern is to deal with a screaming child to put an end to the issue, you should not unnecessarily subject yourself to public pressure with those insensitive and unsympathetic glances as they will never know until they go through the situation personally.

It is rather superficial to say that all methods used to deal with a screaming child will work like magic the first time around. Your child has his/her own mind and willpower, thus you should hold on to what you belief will work and have it repeated to establish a pattern that your child will eventually submit to as the ground rule. And remember that personal belief, patience and repetition is the key to deal with a screaming child.

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How To Identify Personality Type From Your Kids Behavior

Posted by Sarah on February 4th, 2012

How To Identify Personality Type From Your Kids Behavior

With the increasing awareness of the possibility to predict children’s future via various types of assessment on kids behavior, many parents have placed much emphasis on early education and talent nurturing programs to help their kids develop more defined personality type faster. Potentials aside, identifying personality type from your kids behavior can in fact help you deal with kids behavior problems better, or in another word, lets you gain better perspective of why your child is cut to be as he or she is.

Whether you are trying to guide your child to better kids behavior or adding values to his/her existing personality, helping your child find their piece of programming code early will put more light into their future individuality. Although human brain is complex, there are a few distinctive criteria that can be measured upon kids behavior to identify personality type.

Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator (MBTI)

Despite the many personality type theories around, Carl Jung’s theory is one of the most commonly adopted which was further elaborated in Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator that reveals 16 possible personality types where your child can come with a combination of types but fundamentally exhibits prominence in one of them.

In the simplest explanation, MBTI generates 16 personality types from combinations of 4 dichotomy functions illustrated as follows:

Attitude	Irrational Function	Rational Function	Dominant Parameter
Source of energy for mental recharge	How they receive information	How they process information	Function used in conscious and most confident way
[E] Extrovert	[S] Sense	[T] Thinking	[J] Judging
[I] Introvert	[N] Intuition	[F] Feeling	[P] Perceiving

Hence, from the diagram below, we can see that kids behavior that is attributable to personality types in the right hemisphere will be those who prefer concrete reasoning and more of an implementer while the left hemisphere are those who are inclined to abstract reasoning and more of a theorist. So, which personality type does your child belongs to?

ESTJ

Personality Type: Extraverted Sensing Thinking Judging

For children under this personality type, they usually display outgoing kids behavior and carry unwavering confidence in most of the things they do. Holding high regards on the importance and integrity of law and order, they follow procedure and practice consistencies in performing every tasks. Other kids behavior related to this personality type are:

Having pragmatic and aggressive personality where they perform work in conformance to a set of predetermined formula or system and thus strive to meet the goal in shortest time possible along the process flow
Impatient temperament due to their aggressiveness which is often triggered by their dissatisfaction over people who are less efficient or lack of ability to see things from their perspective. Hence, when conflict of interest arise, they will be withdrawn emotionally in resentment of being undervalued by others
Loud in nature as they tend to be very expressive about their point of views and do not glaze their comments be it positive or negative which can often be hurtful to other people
Take lead rather than follow as they are very clear with the direction and have a plan on carrying out the task which make them result-oriented
Expected unchanging routine where they anticipate every situation to fall in place which gives them a sense of security and stability

ISTJ

Personality Type: Introverted Sensing Thinking Judging

If your child falls into this category of personality type, he/she is quiet and reserved in general but a rule-follower without fail. Due to their submissive and compliant nature, they usually receive affection from family members and teachers for their responsibility and dependability character. Some of the related kids behavior exhibited by this personality type are:

Take pleasure in classroom lessons as they prefer to abide to rules and tasks with clearly-defined goals and instructions
Like to do things in organized and systematic fashion and dislike routine disruptions and hence prefer working alone although they can be flexible team player at times
Strong sense of duty as they are committed to finish a task regardless of hours spent and extent of effort which may be overburdening without realizing it themselves
Take things at logical value where information is only viable to them if backed by concrete, logic and analytical facts and align to their personal perspective
Does not like to express feelings and emotions but speak with their caring and responsible gestures to loved ones and always keep their promise

ESFJ

Personality Type: Extraverted Sensing Feeling Judging

Being a person who put great emphasis in feelings, children of this personality type nourish their self worth through caring and giving to others. As a child, they may be seen as being the big brother or sister among siblings and peers. Being a sensitive person, they are welcome by people around them as a kind and understanding friend who take other’s problems with concern. Other ESFJ personality type-related kids behavior are:

Loves to be around people and is interested in reading their cues, issues and needs where they are always ready to lend a hand to improve situations and ensure everyone is contented
A crowd pleaser in general where their source of motivation is from people’s acceptance and approval of their helpful deed and may be discouraged if being misunderstood
Keen for peace and harmony, your child may feel the need to follow a strict set of principle which is developed around social and cultural norms and expected everyone to be in the same tune which can be a bit manipulative at times
With their nature that upholds life security and steadiness, they take watchful steps to ensure things work within control and often scrutinize before taking the leap

ISFJ

Personality Type: Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging

If you feel that your child is most comfortable in environment or situations they know best and slow to warm up to new settings, then his/her personality type is tuned to following time-tested and results-proven rules in doing things. As an introvert, your kids behavior are reserved but yet are meticulous about his/her surroundings. Other likely kids behavior includes:

Fussy and put great emphasis on tidiness and organization in doing things, which signify their dutifulness and responsibilities
Rigid in thoughts and actions where they always follow the same set of procedure in doing things as security and routine are their utmost concern
Prevail in work/assignments with predetermined steps and expectation where they strive to ensure every detail is followed through strictly in order to please parents, teachers and authority figure
Tends to bottle up feelings to the point of diminishing own value as they put great concern in other’s feelings and needs
Seldom turn down other’s request as their self-esteem are fueled by people’s positive feedback
Very observant about surrounding where they incorporate complementing values from people or environment into own principle to strengthen personal value
Very self-critical especially when they receive negative remarks or feel they can handle situations better which may greatly discourage them with feelings of self-inadequacy

ESTP

Personality Type: Extraverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving

Children whose personality type falls into this category are usually seen to be brimmed full with energy and prefer outdoor physical activities. Being an extrovert, your child gets self-reassurance and self-esteem from social interactions. In their earliest stages of life, some of the apparent kids behavior can be:

Constantly asking questions to fulfill curiosity
Jump into actions without much of second thought on subject of interest
Resistant to suggestions or advices regardless of peoples feelings as they are firmly bound by own views and principles
Dislike theory where active learning through examples works best for them to absorb the lesson
Dislike rigid rules or conformance and need to be reminded and corrected on the spot
Short attention span and chase for breadth rather than depth of knowledge
Likes bringing fun ambience with their quick wits and talking as they value life especially the presence
Good in reading fine human expression prints which enables them to motivate or manipulate situations

ISTP

Personality Type: Introverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving

Under this personality type, it is very common to see your child constantly fascinated by anything that comes with mechanism. For this reason, your kids behavior is very analytical as well as process-oriented and is very likely to see him/her enjoying time alone to study on subject of interests. Other kids behavior related to this personality type are:

Prefer to find their own ways of doing things which explain their dislikes in rules and regulations which restricts their freedom to explore alternatives
Disinterested in abstract and theory-based lessons where they find no practicality in studying them and thus gets bored easily. Therefore action-oriented tasks and lessons are best in nurturing their skills
Thrive in technical-based studies and tasks as they have logical and reasoning aptitude
With their self-confidence, they are very independent and trust their personal judgments on their ability to surmount any matter which can be defragmented and analyzed
Being a “facts-person”, they rarely bring in emotional values to prevent biased judgments which makes them appear to be less-friendly
Despite being an introvert, they click with the few who has the same mentality and are easy-going in general as they prefer flexibility and hence do not dominate communications with other people

ESFP

Personality Type: Extraverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving

Lucky parents to easy going children under this personality type can expect fine weather most of the time as your children constantly carry buoyancy and spontaneity in their kids behavior. Constantly in the upbeat mood, they earn a lot of friends along the way with their non-judgmental attitude. Some of the other kids behavior related to this personality type are:

Love physical activities especially outdoor ones where they get to interact with new people and gain new experience
Bubbly and fun, they like bringing laughter to family and friends and enjoy being in the limelight and are generally popular among their peers. Because of their non-critical character, they often help mending soured friendships with their caring and understanding behavior
With their lack of thinking trait in this personality type, they seldom think about consequences of actions or decisions and hence lack of perspective in future undertakings. Instead, they relish in the presence by going with the flow
Children of this personality type seldom take interest in theory and conceptual lessons and absorbs better through learning by examples
Just as expected from an optimistic character, they seldom dwell long in problems and try to get over the problems by looking for the most practical solutions (be it rational or not) available in present to avoid being bogged down by negative feelings

ISFP

Personality Type: Introverted Sensing Feeling Perceiving

Children with this personality type put a lot of emphasis on their five senses in absorbing information as well as in decision-making. Being a sentimental person, your child may possess quiet and reserved kids behavior but one who has strong life principle of their own. Other kids behavior in relation to this personality type are:

May appear unfriendly to people with their withdrawn character but those who can dive beyond the “cool” surface will find them a kind and caring friend who are sensitive to people’s feelings and needs with their ability to read fine expressions
Appreciate personal time and space for reflections which define their dreamer personality that keeps them pursuing perfection in doing things and personal value. As such, they uphold quality of goal achievement more than honoring procedure and time constraint
They prefer artistic lessons and self –enrichment programs compared to theoretical and scientific subjects
Personal values hold stronger influence on their decision compared to rules and norms
All in all they are neutral in personality and respect people freedom and expected vice versa as well as have an eye for natural beauty

ENTJ

Personality Type: Extraverted Intuition Thinking Judging

Kids behavior which carry traits from this personality shows that they are practical and logical in nature. With a no-nonsense attitude, they are very decisive and forceful in putting through ideas and actions but may exhibit this trait as more of an aggression in early age. Other kids behavior in relation to this personality type are:

Ability to break subjects into logical pieces making problem-solving manageable by fitting issue into their perspective
Energetic, ambitious and like strong-control of situations as they have confidence in their own opinion which may at times neglect people’s feeling for disregarding their suggestions
Carries a very positive outlook as they feel they have the key to every situations and therefore this characteristic reflect in their dominant communication both in work and family
Have limited endurance in inefficiencies and where their corrective remarks often carry harsh tones which intimidate people around them. Hence, they should be guided in showing more consideration and sensitivity towards own and other’s emotion.

INTJ

Personality Type: Introverted Intuition Thinking Judging

A child with this personality has very good grasp about big pictures and capable of making sense out of observations and applying their knowledge in putting new information to good use. Although this capability may not stand out at young age, some of the early kids behavior that tell of this personality type inclination are:

A patient observer of nature details which often seen them enjoying the quiet peace to do their thinking or immerse in imaginations
Ambitious and enjoy exploring depth of knowledge in things that capture their interest and may come up with funny and unique ideas or creation which may or may not be applicable at times
As young child, their great potential may enable them to see things in a more profound and complex way but their expression limitation may discourage them from sharing their views with others unless the other party is interested and able to understand their perspective which explains their reserved nature and less urge to express feelings and emotions
Despite being quiet in nature, children of this personality are receptive to people’s opinion and suggestions

ENTP

Personality Type: Extraverted Intuition Thinking Perceiving

If your child constantly display observant kids behavior and shares his/her positive views with you, then they are probably wired with this personality type which explains their interest in finding purpose in life. With his/her optimistic character, your child value people and surroundings and try to relate to them by taking the initiative to study other’s behavior and attitude. Some of their special kids behavior related to this personality type are:

Undeterred by problems and is quick to think up ways and means to counter issues
Their wittiness puts them ahead in debates and discussion. However, if unguided, your kid behavior may become manipulative for wrong purpose
Interested in delving into any issues encoded with theories and concepts, giving them a sense of optimism in dealing with a diverse of situations although efficiency level comes in proportion with age and maturity
Brimmed full with own philosophy, his/her ideas often lose the sparks when it comes to implementation as he/she is not interested in concept application. With their short attention span, it is best to engaged them in highly interactive lessons or programs to nurture the exploratory mind while asserting some rules to instill patience and responsibility to carry the project through finishing point
Their optimism is also their most attractive asset in which their upbeat personality makes people feel at ease in being his/her team players

INTP

Personality Type: Introverted Intuition Thinking Perceiving

Just like ENTP, children with INTP personality type are enthralled by theoretical and conceptual subject matters and dread the execution tasks. However, contrary to the outgoing attitude of its counterpart, INTP children display the opposite kids behavior in regards to social interactions. Other kids behavior related to this personality type are:

Pursue depth of understanding in interest niche and give all it takes to comprehend and build upon the subject matter. For younger children, this may be exhibited in their inclination to do a lot of self-study on materials which may be difficult to grasp for other kids of their age
See beyond complexity by separating problems into manageable modules comprehensible from their perspective
They have strong sense of self-confidence but are quiet in nature which often lead them to portray a serious outlook
They are very practical individual who does not let emotions to factor in during decision making as feelings are of little importance in dealing with themselves and others
They dislike structured and rigid environment and thus the best settings to nurture mind creativity is by putting them in classes which encourage exploration through projects while a clearly defined outcome or result is laid out

ENFJ

Personality Type: Extraverted Intuition Feeling Judging

Most children with this personality type tends to show warm and caring kids behavior although less in magnitude at earlier stage when they are still bound to tantrums and other natural behaviors. However, their natural attitude is less aggressive and as they catch up in age and maturity, these children will display more sensitivity towards other people’s feelings. Kids behavior likely to relate to this personality type are:

Buoyant and cheerful personality where they feed their own happiness by bringing contentment to others where encouraging them to join in community service societies may nurture their helpful attitude with skills
They are insightful to people’s emotion and necessity that they will try to find ways to help those in need. As such, they get personal satisfaction from helping others as well as social acceptance and acknowledgement from their friends
Because of their giving nature, children with ENFL personality type usually conceal their own feelings and needs while working their best on others. They may be independent and decisive on the outside but they will cry in the dark if being let down or misunderstood by others
As they value their relationships with people, they turn out to be a reliable pal who believe in mutual trust and unconditional love
Process oriented individual who enjoy going through the procedure of tasks over orientating towards results

INFJ

Personality Type: Introverted Intuition Feeling Judging

With their gentle and caring kids behavior, children of this personality type respect and care for the feelings of their loved ones. Bound by their introverted intuition and feelings, they may not be as expressive as their ENFJ counterpart but instead are more in tune to their internal feelings. Other related kids behavior are:

Have an artistic flair and interested in creative projects
Tend to rely on their instinct and feelings when making judgments. Some children are able to develop this ability into deriving outcome from their hunches but this is very subjective to each individual
Because they trust their own instinct, they find it restricting to pass judgments based on data and facts analysis or studying situations in great detail and may also disregard facts and reasoning. Despite their intuitive character, they can be guided to do some reasoning on their observations to help putting information into more tangible perspective

ENFP

Personality Type: Extraverted Intuition Feeling Perceiving

With an out-going and lively attitude, children of this personality type are always striving to stay positive and happy by taking charge of the ambience in any situations. Although they are not inclined to adopt rational and logic to solve problems, they tackle problems through self adaptation according to their comfort level but not to the point of being submissive which compromise their happiness. Being a flexible individual, ENFP children usually display the following kids behavior:

Warm and easy-going with people as they enjoy positive social interactions. Younger version of this personality type will go great lengths to bring fun to their peers as a way to click in peer groups because they are able to tell what ticks
Their optimism is reflected with their enthusiastic attitude and initiative to face up to problems to clear the air rather than dodging unwanted situations. In younger children, they are seen as being adaptive and less panicky which consequently make them happier than others
With their upbeat kids behavior, they naturally earn many friends who get motivated with their bubbly personality type
They are feeling-oriented and constantly strive for inner peace to maintain their cheerfulness. Hence, it is common to see them constantly in search of activities or new interests that will give them sense of satisfaction in pursuing the interest. Therefore, helping them to identify their area of interest will flourish their talents as they will work happily towards their goal.
Dislike monotonous lessons and programs and hence they need some visual or interactive elements to be incorporated into the subjects to capture their attention

INFP

Personality Type: Introverted Intuition Feeling Perceiving

In early years of life, children carrying this personality type may share about the same kid behavior with ENFP that go after peace and happiness to maintain their positivity and optimism but they diverge by displaying more profound personality as they get older. INFP personality type goes beyond self-adaptation and seeks more in-depth understanding of the situations, often based on feelings and intuition rather than facts and details in quest for solution that brings longer-lasting emotion contentment. In general, INFP personality may exhibit the following kids behavior:

They would try finding consensus that makes all party “feel” comfortable with instead of judging on fairness as they are less detail-oriented, nor are they wired to facts and data to make analytical judgments
Highly sensitive to people’s emotion and always lend an ear to help them gain better perspective of situations and do whatever they can to soothe their feelings
They develop personal values upon feelings and intuitions that brings emotional comfort rather than based on facts and customary standards
They find life purpose by striving to bring happiness and peace by helping others at all cost. However, they may be best at the position of giving help to others rather than playing partnership to walk the same cause as they tend to try to dominate in the collaboration with their perfectionist characteristic . Simply said, their introvert nature lets them work best on their own
In general, they are kind and passionate about helping others and lend their hands without second thought and earn friends through their kindness and serenity

No matter which personality type your child may belong to, their uniqueness can shine just as bright as any other personality type you may envy. Given the right guidance that complement their kids behavior, your child will grow up with better self-confidence and have a clearer direction in life rather than being trained to live up to parents’ expectations that may be conflicting to their nature.

Personality type may program every individual differently in attitude and thinking. However, knowing how to harness our own quality will give us the ultimate purpose of living our life. After all, an ordinary person who knows how to work on their positive qualities are happier than a gifted person who constantly feel inadequate in chasing after quality that they may not have come with.

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11 to 12 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

11 to 12 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

Toward the end of childhood and in preparation for teenage hood, your 11 year olds and 12 year olds will experience flips in their thinking and kids behavior. Just as they are settling in on the waves of changes, puberty sets in with hormonal changes, shaking up emotional rollercoaster where their volatile temperaments may bring painful episodes to people around them.

However, with more understanding and unrequited love from parents, your soon-to-be-teenagers will eventually feel your care and be more ready to take your lead in smoothing out the creases along the journey to adulthood.

Reserved Physical Expressions

With their newly-claimed independence and coupled with their struggle to cope with their peer culture, our 11 and 12 year olds may display more interest in clinging to their friends than bonding with the family. They would be so hyped up in following trends and fashions and their inconsiderate kids behavior of locking the phone for long-winded conversations may not be acceptable to many parents.

While the cold distance shown in the kids behavior is disheartening for parents after years of investing unconditional love on them, the transition actually signifies their need for deeper-meaning in our relationships with them other than physical expression of love as this will lead to them being labeled as “little babies” among their peers. Hence, parents should respect their call for privacy by acknowledging that our 11 year olds are turning into teenagers who prefer real talk (only when needed) over hugs and kisses.

Emotionally Sensitive

For the egocentric 11 and 12 year olds, most of them feel that the camera is always rolling on them and as a result, over-sensitivity and anxiety are always trailing the kids behavior. Even the slightest glance, murmurs or giggles that reach their ear felt like they are really directed to them, slicing their confidence and provoking their temper at the same time.

11 to 12 Year Olds Kids Behavior Peer Pressure

Nevertheless, most children are able to get over the disturbing kids behavior by having a few supportive close friends who are non-judgmental which explains the phenomenon of interest group divide and formation of quality friendship that will last in times of needs. However, some are stuck in the dilemma with the absence of caring friends and understanding parents. Hence, we should acknowledge the kids behavior as a transitional phase and express genuine sympathy on their situation even if they don’t require our advice and opinion.

Critical About Others

Just as they are being judged upon, our 11 year olds can also be big critic themselves. They may likely have developed a set of their personal belief where they isolate people whose behavior and action oppose their principle or those who do not walk the talk. Family members, especially parents are the most common target of the unforgiving kids behavior and therefore we as parents will need to reflect on our own behavior and actions while watching over their shoulders or we will be dismissed as being a hypocrite .

While our 11 year olds are frequently trap in the world of critics which brings pain to people around them, they are equally sad and confused over the different views and opinions that are poles apart. Just be there for them, avoid unnecessary conflicts to worsen the kids behavior and things will take a turn for the better as the pandemonium smoothes out when they enter teenage hood.

Onset of Physical Changes

Approaching 12 years old, our children will touch the early adolescence and experience a series of bodily changes, although the occurrence comes earlier for girls than boys. Our 12 year olds may frequently gather up to exchange information and get reassurance about whether their development is on the normal track. Interests for the opposite sex may also be displayed in the kids behavior at this stage. As such, we should be prepared to give them the correct information about what love encompass in an honest relationship as well as the awareness about sexual violence and self-protection.

Some 12 year olds may also engage in masturbation but parents should not get too bewildered by the kids behavior as it is a natural form of self-exploration about sexuality. As hormonal changes introduces the sexual desires which may lead to uneducated sexual kids behavior, providing them with educational material or explanation which are appropriate to their level of understanding will show them about your care and understanding while giving them accurate exposure on the subject that intrigues them.

Smart Talk

Being one of the natural kids behavior that comes with their intellectual and cognitive progress, our kids have packed in the skill to convey message or express a statement with manipulative flavors. You may notice that the young 11 year olds and 12 year olds may not be as innocent as before because they have the skills to talk themselves out of situations or influence things to work their way.

Although this kids behavior may not be favorable upfront, if given the right direction by teaching them about the ethical practice in utilizing the speech skill, our 11 and 12 year olds can grow up with additional negotiation and possibly marketing skill in the future.

Rebellious

Again, our 11 and 12 year olds are very driven by their unstable temperament where 11 year olds are more prominent in exhibiting defiant kids behavior than the 12. Choked full of personal views and opinions, they find that the rules set and restrictions imposed on them are rigid and irrelevant and that they are able to handle themselves well without needing the guidelines to monitor their conduct.

Before we dismiss the kids behavior as down right insolent, we should ask ourselves if we have been over protective and that our boundaries are still oriented to younger childhood? While parents concerns are very much justified, relaxing on minor guidelines such as bed time, meal time and play time will provide our 11 year olds the much needed sense of freedom and be less resistant in coping up with the more significant rules.

Down to Earth

Every now and then comes new discoveries and exposure through peer communication. Language progress enables them to read more diverse materials to gain knowledge and lights. Furthermore, with the self-centered kids behavior, the 11 and 12 year olds can easily be challenged into risky endeavors such as smoking or drinking. To them, they are every bit confident that many situations can be handled without fail.

Although having positive kids behavior is the main ingredient to raising a child with confidence and self-esteem, conveying your clear concerns, expectation and reservations towards acceptable activities that may have risks margins should be done early at this stage. In common circumstances, your 11 and 12 year olds would take your words if done in a caring but non-pushy way. However, if you feel that your kids continue with risky kids behavior despite various conversation, it is perhaps wise to seek the help from other trustworthy person whom they are willing to listen to as rebellious kids tends to turn a deaf ear on parents advice as a way to defend their personality and identity.

Wrapping Up

The tween years are the most trying phase for both parents and children as parents struggle to provide safety nets while the children are excited about trying out their wings in the wide world. We may have oversee the consequences of the kids behavior just when they embark on something but deterring them from taking the ride from start will conjure up feelings of being treated unfairly and would be more determined to take the decision.

The best a parent can do is perhaps making the environment as under control as possible and intervene to prevent hazardous consequences to befall on them. Parents should have patience and hold on for a little while as the turbulent kids behavior at this stage are merely transitional phase.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

9 to 10 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

9 to 10 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

Being in the latency stage, the 9 year olds and 10 year olds have no significant development curve but rather are perfecting their physical, emotional, cognitive and social skills where their personality and kids behavior are taking a more defined shape by assimilating all these areas.

Pro-Democracy

Even at as young as eight, our kids have already wanted some freedom of speech in decision-making, what more in the 9 and 10 year olds. Hence, it is not a bad idea to give them more allowance to exercise their freedom in decision-making surrounding family issues. By guiding the positive kids behavior in using proper manner to negotiate through situations, your kids will be less inclined to develop aggressive kids behavior while upholding their thoughts.

Pro-Social

During this stage, tagging along famous friends or group gives them status identity and coupled with their better independence, your 9 year olds may prefer to spend longer time with their friends, even sleeping over, as they are more prepared for temporary separations. Peer relationship holds great emphasis in the 9 year olds and 10 year olds, so as the peer pressure and influence. While a healthy friendship serves as the foundation to sustaining healthy bonding in future relationships, bad influences will breed negative kids behavior and worse, pose detrimental effects in their personality.

As parents, we should keep close watch of any red flags in the kids behavior but, be wary that overly concern can be mistaken as checking them out. Hence, we should always respect and give trusts in their capability of selecting friends so that they will be more open to share about things related to their friendship. This will give you the opportunity to provide advice on the consequences (good or bad) when they are doubtful about buying into their peers’ ideas.

Perfectionist

While 9 and 10 year olds are still a playful lot among their peers, our kids will put more concern on their academic and/or extracurricular achievements to proof self-competence. We should therefore be supportive of their pursue but keep them at the healthy competitive level where positive kids behavior to respond to defeats and/or retreats must also be taught in preventing emotional breakdowns when things do not go with their flow.

Persistence or Obsession?

Children around nine or ten are also likely to pick up a hobby or two which retain most of their attention besides studies, outdoor activities and friends. They can be absorbed in their crafts, games or books during idle times to the point of ignoring duties on hand. As such, the parents should refine their kids behavior especially in the 10 year olds by introducing self-control and time management to achieve balance between responsibilities and personal interests.

To encourage positive changes in the kids behavior, you may both negotiate tasks-reward system to support their hobbies (such as buying their favorite craft set) in exchange to major house chores contribution or show your pride for their responsible kids behavior for minor duty fulfillments. Kids are still kids and they need a good dose of enticement at times.

Routine Deviation

With their expanding social circle, our 9 year olds are exposed to various routines and kids behavior from their peers or even through television programs. In order to click with the trend, our kids may alter their preference in food, sleeping patterns and other daily routines. Giving them freedom in moderation will offer room for self-exploration by personally experiencing their choice and the corresponding consequences.

For parents, just make sure that the new kids behavior do not pose unfavorable effects on their health and life in general. If they do, talk to them about your expectation and concerns about their wellbeing. You may also notice that your 9 and 10 year olds are not as enthusiastic about helping with the dishes, laundry, trash or room cleaning compared to toddler time but it is important to take your stand and let them know that every member in the family needs to share the house chores responsibilities.

Extremist

At this age, our 10 year olds are capable to distinguish the sense of rights and wrongs based on the values infused by family practices and societal exposures. And with a pro-democratic kids behavior, they analyze every questionable situations based on good-or-bad as well as cause-and-effect approach and rarely have comprehension about other factors in between which sometimes trigger overreactions and radical responses to defend their stands.

Handling tricky situations like this requires lots of patience as we do not wish to make them feel demotivated for upholding righteous kids behavior. Perhaps, we can tweak their mentality by providing more details on related issues and alternatives to approach the subject matter to show your care and support while mollifying their emotional turmoil.

Anxieties

Small in build but large in thinking, your 9 year olds have lots to think about the world and future. As children from different backgrounds share a lot in groups, your child may have collected partial information and interpret issues incorrectly with their limited understanding.

If you see your child showing depressed or confused kids behavior, try comforting them by providing real picture of the situation in concern. Never belittle their anxieties as this will pose negative impact on their personality and future kids behavior. Additionally, encouraging them to participate in community service societies will help them to appropriately channel their passion while paving a path to a purposeful life.

Wrapping Up

The kids of 9 year olds and 10 year olds generally have straightforward character and unbending kids behavior as their personality is taking shape and taking sides which is still a fearful uncertainties to them. By being more of a listener and less of a critic, our kids will be more ready to perceive their parents as a confidant and more willing to accept opinions and advices to guide them on their kids behavior.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

6 to 8 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

6 to 8 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

As our 6 year olds enter elementary school, their kids behavior will somewhat remain steady mainly among 7 and 8 year olds. Around this time of age, the concept of peer formation runs a deeper meaning where they prefer to develop enduring friendship which helps a lot in building individual identity within the group of same interests.

Semi Dependent

With the role of peers taking a larger part in our 6 to 8 year olds life, our child’s affection towards parents will be shared with the larger community. Nevertheless, the beauty of the transition in the kids behavior also accelerate the grasp of logic sense as they share thoughts in group communications besides receiving information from formal education.

In some cases, they may even idolize someone of authority such as caregiver or teacher where their kids behavior can be influenced by the good or bad examples being displayed to them. However, intervention by parents will not be a good idea but liaising with the influential person to inculcate good kids behavior will win parents the sense of being understanding and supportive to their children.

Crowd Pleaser

For the 6 to 8 year olds, entering the middle childhood is a whole new experience as the value of friendship is redefined and their desire to be counted into peer group is a symbol of social acceptance. In order to get along, your child may trace other kids behavior by going after the same movie programs, books, food and even use jargons to establish group-identity.

But one thing good about their newly-found kids behavior mirroring is that your child starts to accept the concept of abiding to rules, even of it’s only group level. As such, they will learn self-adjustments to complement the environment.

As for parents, we need to keep our kids behavior checked regularly to identify any trend that may deviate from family norms. Through early intervention, we can help our kids in finding ways to compromise between friends and family customs without getting disconnected on either side.

Self-Conscious

For the 6 year olds, it is the beginning of their ability to acknowledge themselves as an individual with own preference but still lack of sense in perception about the surrounding and vice versa.

However, our 7 year olds will be brimmed full of self awareness where peer perception about them matter more than anything else. On the other hand, the family values which he/she picked up since early age also laid the foundation of their mentality about what are being expected from them. When these two agendas do not click, our poor kids will end up confused and frustrated over peer criticism and judgmental kids behavior of others towards them.

Although the effect may not be to the extent of emotional breakdown, proper guidance and support in clearing their self-doubts will affirm their personality and personal beliefs to grow up being a more confident teenager.

Competitive Mind

In the process of shaping their personality, young kids like 6 to 8 year olds love competitions and their view of being the leader in the pack accentuate the sense of self and public approval, especially in the eyes of people they respect or try impressing.

While a healthy dose of motivation is essential, uncontrolled winning desire in the kids behavior may turn into obsession and pressure them to be a perfectionist. Hence, we should teach them about putting friendship in priority and enjoy the game/competition process over win-lose outcome. Best of all, show them how you carry your virtue when you take the losing hand in games/competition and they will apply it to kids behavior more effectively.

Sibling Rivalry

The display of this trait in the 6 to 8 year olds largely arise from their competitive inclination where each siblings are trying to win their parents’ attention. As it is impossible to be fair on every occasion, the kids need to learn to live with the privilege differences that comes with age. The best way is to let the siblings work it out among themselves and only step in before challenges turn physical.

Another approach to decrease vying occurrences in kids behavior is to give them praises or rewards when they get along, share, care and support for each other.

Sexual Awareness

It is actually no surprise that children as young as 8 year olds develop an interest to find answers to fulfill their inquisitive minds as infants also realize the presence of sexual organs being more special over other body parts. We should therefore not be offended by the kids behavior of constantly asking embarrassing questions or trying to peep others.

Never let your anger take the better of you as distress may spark silent and more dangerous curiosity and heightened kids behavior in responding to this issue in future. Instead, parents should explain to them that affectionate touches are only reserved for showing love and respect between moms and dads and as kids, they have an important job to keep private parts protected even from friend and not be violated against.

Rules Challenger

As 6 to 8 year olds just stepped out from tots’ world not long ago, there are still some playful characteristic in their kids behavior. Hence, they will frequently slack in routines and obligations especially those set up at home to test the boundaries.

To buckle up some disciplines in your kids behavior, revamp some house rules with your child participation. Give them small degree of allowance in setting bed time or playtime for instance and they will likely feel more satisfied for having some say in the house. This win-win situation will not only bind them but also train them on negotiation skills to replace all-or-nothing kids behavior.

Wrapping Up

6 year olds to 8 year olds are at their most innocent stages of life and have high hopes of what the world has in stored for them. With the appropriate guidance and lots of patience and understanding, parents can carve many positive kids behavior out of their personality.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

4 to 5 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

4 to 5 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

At 4-5 years of age, your child will have developed most of the gross motor skills and the shaping of kids behavior are more oriented towards discovery and knowledge of surrounding environment and interpersonal relationships.

4 year olds and 5 year olds are pretty excited to absorb as much understanding of whatever situations that they come across and with their capability to start comprehending feelings, elucidating the value of being considerate and caring will inculcate compassion and kindness in the kids behavior.

Inquisitive and talkative

Just as expected with their inquisitive kids behavior, our 4 year olds will be pestering us with no-ending “Whys” and “Hows”, sometimes to the point of irritating. As supportive parents, we should always be prepared for them to be clingy but when you sense they are purposefully asking questions that strings back to the first question, try mimicking this kids behavior by having them answer the questions and see the funny response in their faces.

Corresponding to their realization of gender identification and sense of self, our 5 year olds will likely pop the sensitive questions of how and where they come from or what differentiates boys from girls and the best response of all time is telling them the truth (but not TMI). Never display embarrassment or avoidance as these will heightened their curiosity and get them excited to continue with the “amusing” kids behavior (or so they thought).

Friendship Perceived As Companionship NOT Partnership

As they begin to assimilate into pre-school settings, our 4 year olds will enjoy the fun-filled dynamics of involving other kids into game plays and conversations although turn-taking and sharing concepts are still hard to come by in the kids behavior as they are easy to be overwhelmed by the activities.

With gradual grasp in sense of ownership when approaching 5, they will be less egocentric and are able to establish interactive friendships. However, for the less cooperative kids, a little authority intervention may be asserted such as imposing time-outs to penalize their selfish kids behavior where a good eye-to-eye session will be effective to explain the consequences of their action with 5 year olds.

Physical Activeness

The agility in the 4 year olds and 5 year olds is not likely to decrease anywhere within next few years and extra safety precautions must be taken. To keep their vigorous kids behavior in control, try engaging them in more fun outdoor activities to channel their energies towards constructive productivity.

Frustrations and Mood Swings

Our 4 year olds are now beginning to explore abstract feelings which pretty much explain their sudden flips of happy- and sad-mode. However, this instability in kids behavior does not come without reason. Even though they should be given some space to adjust and assert control of feelings, refrain them from taking it out on others or the exploration may go out of hand and turn into demanding and unreasonable individual personality. Instead, help them to describe feelings or difficulties being encountered in words and explain the causes and introduce ways to overcome negative experience to nurture positive kids behavior.

Moving on to 5 year olds, kids at this age will display a more prominent personality where most will have developed a negotiable kids behavior. However, those inclined to aggression may have bred negative kids behavior from lack of directions in emotional control at earlier stage. Although their capability to talk and fight back makes it trickier to implement corrective actions, prolonging those negative kids behavior will make it more difficult to be reversed in later stages.

Imaginary Playmates

4 Year Olds Kids Behavior Imaginary Friend

Imaginary friend is one of the classic transition signs among 4 year olds and 5 year olds that may linger well on to elementary school. While many parents are bewildered by their kids behavior of talking to the invisible companion, experts suggest that family members should be supportive instead of discouraging them as make-believe friends help them in developing their identity.

Despite a little awkward, playing along with your child can provide alternative channel to understand more about your kids behavior and if handled well can train them to be independent by encouraging your child to help his/her “friends” to clean up after play or do things by themselves.

Attention Seekers

Have you noticed that your 4 year olds and 5 year olds show you every little work they did in school and sharing every little achievement they attained? If you feel that their boastful kids behavior are a little off limit, in actuality, they are merely seeking your approval to reinforce their self-confidence.

In fact, their attention-seeking appetite can also be used to your advantage where negative kids behavior can likely be discouraged when you withdraw your attention to disapprove mischievous acts. Even if they may not give in immediately, the displeasure is all it takes to put a halt and give us the opportunity to point out their mistakes.

Lies and Cheats

Generally, our 4 year olds are not telling lies to bail themselves out of mistakes. Rather, the kids behavior arise from their needs to “get in the crowd” or “go their way”. They may be picking up movie lines and take it as reality or saying they are given permission by teacher/nanny to do things they like but are restricted by us, anything that gives them the reasons to achieve their wishes. By spending more time with them, parent will be able to distinguish truth from lies as well as understanding and acknowledging their needs will eliminate their needs for manipulative kids behavior to bring their wishes to your attention.

Wrapping up

The 4 year olds and 5 year olds are little creatures who can be reasoned with provided that communications are kept at the simplest manner. However, it is their same reasoning capability that enables them to debate/disobey our instructions. Nonetheless, we should never cease this kids behavior with threats as forced-submissions will either diminish their self-esteem or breed an individual prone to contempt.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

3 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

3 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

When your child turns three, their developmental focus will shift to fine motor skills while kids behavior and temperament will be slightly more predictable compared to previous years. This is in conjunction with their increasing efficiency in verbal communication skills, enabling them to express and exchange thoughts better. However, 3 year olds kids behavior is not completely tantrum-free especially when it comes to adjourning their favorite activities. Hence, suitable intervention strategy should be adopted to keep the kids behavior manageable.

Scribbling

Our 3 year olds will be able to draw one/two defined strokes such as lines and curves. Hence, the walls and floors will be their most convenient canvas to display their art. However, if you wish to prevent the children scribbling habits from turning into uncontrollable kids behavior that knows no boundary, provide them with papers and dedicated corner to flaunt their creativity.

Unrestrained Agility

You will still observe your energy-packed 3 year olds darting around and turning a deaf ear to your time-out calls. If you are concern over the risks exposed by the kids behavior, take necessary measures to provide safe environment while making simple explanation to them that they might get hurt for doing so. For the moment, keeping close watch is the only option viable to parents and/or caregivers at this stage.

Inconsistent Kids Behavior

With their increased competence to assert more independence, it is natural for 3 year olds to start defending their point of view or things they like, and are often biased towards their personal interests which pretty explain their fickle-minded kids behavior.

Despite their lack of proper judgments, frequent use of negative statements such as “No” and “Don’t” to object their decisions will impede self-confidence development and add to their frustrations. They may even imitate you and be mistaken as a form of kids behavior issue for talking back.

Instead, try to help them phrase their demands based on “What” are they requesting now and “Why” they need to have the request fulfilled will help the 3 year olds to see their negotiation patterns clearer to shape positive kids behavior.

Demanding Democracy

As the 3 year olds enter childhood, they will feel less inclined to blind obligations and forcing our grounds will be counter-effective to the kids behavior where they will be less receptive to our future instructions and advice. Instead of suppressing their free-will, try implementing some liberation by letting them exercise power of choice in controlled environment to nurture their self-assurance and assertive kids behavior.

Temper Irregularity

Although most 3 year olds may have higher capacity to convey feelings before throwing tantrums now, they are still susceptible to emotional roller coaster when triggered by certain stressors indescribable to them. Instead of reprimanding the 3 year olds for their volatile kids behavior, show your care by helping them identify what frustrates or scare them. Punishing them for venting out will force feelings repression and create emotion imbalances and skew their personality.

Potty Slip-Ups

3 Year Olds Kids Behavior Potty Training

During the initial transition from nappies to potty, many 3 year olds tends to hold their bladder when brought to the potty but do the business in their pants a minute after which drives many parent up the wall with this “playful” kids behavior.

In actuality, it is hard for them to relate urgency with the commode in the beginning as they are not yet used to heeding their body cues to request for potty in time. When accidents happen, do not resort to scolding as this response will put-off their motivation and dread the change. Your best effort would be to estimate their nature calls, get the potty in hand and be patient with those kids behavior and stance. If things still don’t work out, suspend the toilet training for a few days to avoid implanting prolonged bad experience.

Wrapping Up

Towards the end of the season, our 3 year olds will improve more on kids behavior where the tantrums intensity lessen in accordance to their understanding of personal desire and level of parental support provided. Although our 3 year olds may not be angelic 24/7, you can breathe a small relief knowing that both of you can talk things through although consensus may not be usually optimistic.

Just bear in mind that giving reasonable respect to their personality will nurture more positive kids behavior compared to subjecting them to rigid conformity.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

2 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

2 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

When your child begins touching two, they will further develop their sensory motor skill where objects around the house become the 2 year olds interest and kids behavior will be more prevalent in physical activity. Although this is a stage when the 2 year olds frequently test the boundaries, your kids behavior will be more controllable if some routines and consistencies are set for them.

Pushing and Pulling

2 Year Olds Kids Behavior Pushing Carts

Now that they have better physical balance on hands and feet, our 2 year olds will take on new and more exciting activities of maneuvering objects around them to establish concept of movements. Your child may be engrossed in pulling and pushing just about anything moveable by them. While the commotion and mess from this kids behavior may be unbearable at times, understand that he is just trying to experiment with their motor skills.

Running and Climbing

Throughout the day, the energetic 2 year olds just don’t seem to tired out with that constant running around and climbing up on high places. Although this type of kids behavior is common and a way to reinforce their physical aptitude, you should child-proof your home to prevent them from getting hurt.

Rough Handling

As our 2 year olds discover the marvels of object permanence, you will see them enjoy the hide-and-go-seek game by searching for an item over and over at the same place. Plus, they tend to take pleasure in dropping things (such as spoons and bowls) repeatedly as we pick up after them. Filling a container and spilling out thereafter is also common. Hence, if you wish to keep the mess and destructions of these kids behavior minimal, provide them with a proper play area and sturdy plastic wares during meal time.

Strong-Willed and Volatile Temperament

During this stage, resistance are quite obvious in kids behavior because their rapid improvement in hand-eye coordination gives urge to the 2 year olds to claim independence in performing daily tasks – eating, putting on shoes, opening and closing bottles, everything that was previously assisted.

However, many a times the struggle and frustration in the kids behavior put parents in mixed feelings of joy and annoyance as 2 year olds are prone to throw tantrum due to impatience and disappointment when encountering learning curves along the way. Hence, being available to guide them in times of difficulty will create less negative impact on their self-esteem and future kids behavior.

Semi-Isolation At Playtime

The concept of sharing and grouping is also something unknown to 2 year olds. While they require some level of companionship during playtime, the notion of sharing and turn-taking will be a difficult grasp in the kids behavior for their level of understanding. If there are older siblings around, the 2 year olds can imitate good kids behavior of sharing from them. Alternatively, parents can play the same role to convey the message through exemplary actions.

Defiant Kids Behavior

With the many changes taking place physically and emotionally, it is typical for 2 year olds to exhibit rebellious kids behavior such as showing disobedience by testing the limits of ground rules and doing things contradictory to parents demands. The good news is the 2 year olds are little creatures who crave for attention and praises to affirm their self confidence as well.

So, the best way to put a halt on undesirable kids behavior is by getting involved in guiding them to do right things and praise them along the way and if refusals turn into tantrums, remove your attention for a while to show your disagreement of the kids behavior before returning later to straighten things out while telling them in a firm tone that you prefer them to show you what they want rather than crying for their demand. Although this may not keep the kids behavior from returning, our repeated pattern of corrective handling will slowly plant the appropriate idea in our 2 year olds attitude.

Wrapping Up

As 2 year olds are barely out of babyhood stage, the future kids behavior patterns of your child largely reflect on how we manage our behavior in handling their situations now. Aggressive responses will imprint impatience and belligerence in kids behavior while maintaining calm and collected attitude to reason things out (even if 2 year olds don’t yet fully understand) will eventually teach them negotiation can also solve problems.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

1 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Posted by Sarah on January 24th, 2012

1 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

Babies at this age develop their first set of kids behavior around socio-emotional capacity. As parents and caregivers play their only major roles in their life, emotional attachment is extremely high where they learn about the value of love and trust in human relationship from the type of attention and response being given to them. The more responsive and patient you are to 1 year olds, the more trust and confidence will be developed in the kids personality foundation for social interactions.

Cries and Tantrums

Cries and tantrums will be normal scenes throughout the days in early life as their only way to communicate hunger, stress, tiredness and boredom is through these cues, and they are not kids behavior problems by any means. Although you may adjust routines (eg. meal time and amount) to space out demands frequency, forceful intervention to set a rigid schedule will be counter-effective and add stress to both you and your baby.

Mess and Destructions

Approaching their first birthday, your baby will start showing interest in exploring the surroundings with their hands and feet. Your baby might twist and turn whatever object that lands in their hand and the last thing you want to let loose is your temper as this will cripple their motivation and self-confidence for motor skill explorations. Instead, be supportive and encourage their inquisitiveness by placing them in a proper kids playing area and keep away things that you wish to protect.

Domineering and Selfish

As their curiosity inflates, your baby might even take objects of interest away from others as their own which led to some parents interpreting this as rudeness and a form of kids behavior issue. In actuality, it is common for 1 year olds to conceptualize the world as revolving around them and hence, the best a parent can do is to detach them from current situation through distraction.

Playing Protest

As babies are getting smarter earlier these days, our 1 year olds will discover their option to turn down things or crying to win their way in opposition. If you are upset over the little kids behavior of turning away from your feeds or refuse to sleep, distract them with other activities before returning to test their acceptance. Try reshuffling the routine or the type of food given for a few days to ‘reset’ their memory.

Wrapping Up

Overall, there are not much major kids behavior issues among 1 year olds as baby needs are pretty predictive and their biggest necessity is your comfort, reassurance and tons of patience.

Kids Behavior Development Stages For Other Age Groups

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