11 to 12 Year Olds Kids Behavior Development and Related Issues

Core Competencies and Kids Behavior

Toward the end of childhood and in preparation for teenage hood, your 11 year olds and 12 year olds will experience flips in their thinking and kids behavior. Just as they are settling in on the waves of changes, puberty sets in with hormonal changes, shaking up emotional rollercoaster where their volatile temperaments may bring painful episodes to people around them. 

However, with more understanding and unrequited love from parents, your soon-to-be-teenagers will eventually feel your care and be more ready to take your lead in smoothing out the creases along the journey to adulthood.

Reserved Physical Expressions

With their newly-claimed independence and coupled with their struggle to cope with their peer culture, our 11 and 12 year olds may display more interest in clinging to their friends than bonding with the family. They would be so hyped up in following trends and fashions and their inconsiderate kids behavior of locking the phone for long-winded conversations may not be acceptable to many parents. 

While the cold distance shown in the kids behavior is disheartening for parents after years of investing unconditional love on them, the transition actually signifies their need for deeper-meaning in our relationships with them other than physical expression of love as this will lead to them being labeled as “little babies” among their peers. Hence, parents should respect their call for privacy by acknowledging that our 11 year olds are turning into teenagers who prefer real talk (only when needed) over hugs and kisses. 

Emotionally Sensitive

For the egocentric 11 and 12 year olds, most of them feel that the camera is always rolling on them and as a result, over-sensitivity and anxiety are always trailing the kids behavior. Even the slightest glance, murmurs or giggles that reach their ear felt like they are really directed to them, slicing their confidence and provoking their temper at the same time. 

Nevertheless, most children are able to get over the disturbing kids behavior by having a few supportive close friends who are non-judgmental which explains the phenomenon of interest group divide and formation of quality friendship that will last in times of needs. However, some are stuck in the dilemma with the absence of caring friends and understanding parents. Hence, we should acknowledge the kids behavior as a transitional phase and express genuine sympathy on their situation even if they don’t require our advice and opinion. 

Critical About Others

Just as they are being judged upon, our 11 year olds can also be big critic themselves. They may likely have developed a set of their personal belief where they isolate people whose behavior and action oppose their principle or those who do not walk the talk. Family members, especially parents are the most common target of the unforgiving kids behavior and therefore we as parents will need to reflect on our own behavior and actions while watching over their shoulders or we will be dismissed as being a hypocrite . 

While our 11 year olds are frequently trap in the world of critics which brings pain to people around them, they are equally sad and confused over the different views and opinions that are poles apart. Just be there for them, avoid unnecessary conflicts to worsen the kids behavior and things will take a turn for the better as the pandemonium smoothes out when they enter teenage hood.

Onset of Physical Changes

Approaching 12 years old, our children will touch the early adolescence and experience a series of bodily changes, although the occurrence comes earlier for girls than boys. Our 12 year olds may frequently gather up to exchange information and get reassurance about whether their development is on the normal track. Interests for the opposite sex may also be displayed in the kids behavior at this stage. As such, we should be prepared to give them the correct information about what love encompass in an honest relationship as well as the awareness about sexual violence and self-protection. 

Some 12 year olds may also engage in masturbation but parents should not get too bewildered by the kids behavior as it is a natural form of self-exploration about sexuality. As hormonal changes introduces the sexual desires which may lead to uneducated sexual kids behavior, providing them with educational material or explanation which are appropriate to their level of understanding will show them about your care and understanding while giving them accurate exposure on the subject that intrigues them.

Smart Talk

Being one of the natural kids behavior that comes with their intellectual and cognitive progress, our kids have packed in the skill to convey message or express a statement with manipulative flavors. You may notice that the young 11 year olds and 12 year olds may not be as innocent as before because they have the skills to talk themselves out of situations or influence things to work their way. 

Although this kids behavior may not be favorable upfront, if given the right direction by teaching them about the ethical practice in utilizing the speech skill, our 11 and 12 year olds can grow up with additional negotiation and possibly marketing skill in the future.

Rebellious

Again, our 11 and 12 year olds are very driven by their unstable temperament where 11 year olds are more prominent in exhibiting defiant kids behavior than the 12. Choked full of personal views and opinions, they find that the rules set and restrictions imposed on them are rigid and irrelevant and that they are able to handle themselves well without needing the guidelines to monitor their conduct. 

Before we dismiss the kids behavior as down right insolent, we should ask ourselves if we have been over protective and that our boundaries are still oriented to younger childhood? While parents concerns are very much justified, relaxing on minor guidelines such as bed time, meal time and play time will provide our 11 year olds the much needed sense of freedom and be less resistant in coping up with the more significant rules. 

Down to Earth

Every now and then comes new discoveries and exposure through peer communication. Language progress enables them to read more diverse materials to gain knowledge and lights. Furthermore, with the self-centered kids behavior, the 11 and 12 year olds can easily be challenged into risky endeavors such as smoking or drinking. To them, they are every bit confident that many situations can be handled without fail. 

Although having positive kids behavior is the main ingredient to raising a child with confidence and self-esteem, conveying your clear concerns, expectation and reservations towards acceptable activities that may have risks margins should be done early at this stage. In common circumstances, your 11 and 12 year olds would take your words if done in a caring but non-pushy way. However, if you feel that your kids continue with risky kids behavior despite various conversation, it is perhaps wise to seek the help from other trustworthy person whom they are willing to listen to as rebellious kids tends to turn a deaf ear on parents advice as a way to defend their personality and identity. 

Wrapping Up

The tween years are the most trying phase for both parents and children as parents struggle to provide safety nets while the children are excited about trying out their wings in the wide world. We may have oversee the consequences of the kids behavior just when they embark on something but deterring them from taking the ride from start will conjure up feelings of being treated unfairly and would be more determined to take the decision. 

The best a parent can do is perhaps making the environment as under control as possible and intervene to prevent hazardous consequences to befall on them. Parents should have patience and hold on for a little while as the turbulent kids behavior at this stage are merely transitional phase.

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